The story of ‘Bill Gates’

Once upon a time,

A man of councils, loved Gates;

And concrete;

All of which could be billed;

Not surprisingly,

He came to be called Bill Gates.

The man of councils; gleefully pulled down

Old and aesthetic gates,

Just to replace them with ‘Ornamental’

Monstrous concrete structures,

But could be billed pretty heavy;

So,

Bill Gates and his merry men had a field day.

And one day he began to pull down the Gate

Of the park yonder, besides the canal;

Sledgehammer and crowbar, pick axe and spade,

His merry men began their dastardly act,

Till a Samaritan of plants and trees,

Said; Halt!

You do what you cannot do; beware

The merry men now chary,

Slunk away sheepishly;

Looks like this gate can’t be billed, Bill Gates,

We have to look for greener pastures.

So the booth that sold milk seemed fertile hunting grounds,

For nary a man or beast would object.
So down came crashing the gate at the booth of milk,

And a moon craters dug,

To take many a truckload of concrete

So the bill of the gate would be heavy

And the gate horrendous to the spectator,

Just the way of Bill Gates.

The people stood by

impervious, nonchalant,

Whilst Bill Gates

Raised Bill on them Gates pretty heavy,

And laughed all his way to the bank.

With malice to none and all

Of Presidents and an uncommon man

Once upon a time;

There lived in a colony; called 'Deaf Call'

Presidents and,

one uncommon man.

And the Presidents had with them;

glitzy cars and chauffeurs and guards,

an entourage of underlings; which they variously called;

Absolut nothing Committee (AC) and;

Exempt everything Committee (EC)

The uncommon man went to them Presidents;

Sire; the parking man wants Rs 20 for parking;

Will you My Lord, spare me from this tax?

And the Presidents and their men;

in unison exclaimed;

We shall impose the tax, not they;

'But sire they do not let us Park'

Woe be gone;

the entreaties of the uncommon man,

fell on the ears of Presidents as a 'Deaf Call' 

And the Presidents and their kinsmen

in all their glory,

sat back and drank their scotch whisky

the common man implored;

My lords, Rs 1500 is required to maintain 'Deaf Call'

​

Only once in the year,

The Presidents retorted,

be gone wastrel,

can you not see; we are busy;

with our scotch and soda,

We are the Lords, the Barons, the Presidents,

we do not pay to maintain our kingdom, 'Deaf Call'

It you O serf; 

who pays the taxes in ‘Deaf Call’,

Be gone

And as the uncommon man trudges home, despondent,

meets on the way; the Commissioner

in benign hope and supplication, the uncommon man implores;

Sire;

you are our last hope;

free us from the parking tax;

Ha; Serf, you want the yoke off your neck?

Then sign away your lands to me;

where I shall construct shops and plazas and parking;

and you can park free;

but your lands of 'Deaf Call' forever and forever shall be mine;

The Presidents drank their fine scotches

in sublime indifference,

the uncommon man headed home

Woe be gone.

​

Yes I Can !

Yes I Can

He came, he saw, he conquered.

Here was this dashing young man with drop dead good looks who didn’t know the meaning of no. ‘Yes I can’ was his standard answer to any and every request made to him by residents.

Initially, a bit chary of this young politician, quick on his feet, answering every call in two rings, and always replying in the affirmative, we watched in amazement. Within minutes of the call being over his trusted lieutenants Harish or Shukla would be there to survey the job, and shortly thereafter, it was carried out.

Was he for real we asked one other? Refreshingly different from the stereotype politician who ran constituencies as their personal fiefdom, condescendingly getting jobs done after sustained doses of ingratiation or gratification, this young man was surely not for real. But real for sure he was.

Residents quickly found this one point call centre attended to their grievances in a jiffy, opposed to the creaky, slow, inefficient redressal systems of yesteryear. Magically the civic body had been energised, efficiency and an air of urgency manifested itself; a new generation politician was rewriting the rulebook. Social media savvy, approachable, affable and ever ready to please; yes it was none other than Abhishek Dutt.

Five years came and went by; all good things must end, and the winds of change swept in; the magic had to move on, to conquer more hearts and build a newer vibrant India.

The Japanese say it the best; ‘Sayonara’ roughly meaning, ‘if it is to be that way’. So Sayonara Abhishek Dutt; go conquer the world, you have left an indelible mark in our hearts.

Defence Colony misses you dearly.

Rajeev Suri: rajeevsuri.cbms@gmail.com